Racewalking

I am going to learn racewalking at a clinic later this year so I can do something lower impact than jogging on the mini track we have in our backyard. I am so excited about it. I have my hotel reservation, I bought some shoes, I hope I'm ready! 

This blurb was at the bottom of the registration form. Doesn't it sound like fun?

WAIVER (Heretofore referred to as “Da Fine Print”): I, being in sound mind and body, do fully understand that participating in the sport of racewalking may result in my being subject to a panoply of physical and emotional ailments. I agree that by attending this clinic, I may be advised by Dave to wiggle my extremities in ways not intended by my creator, and that such wigglings may cause otherwise staid, emotionally stable, yet sedentary passersby to burst out into uncontrollable snickering. In consideration of the acceptance of my entry, I the undersigned, intending to be legally bound for myself, my heirs, executors, administrators and assignees, do hereby waive and release the organizers of this event, the Bureau of Weights and Measures of the State of California, the towns of Solana Beach and Torey Pines, Tory Spelling, Tori Amos, Amos and Andy, Andy Griffith, Griffith Park Zoo, the San Diego Zoo, Bai Yun, Gao Gao, Chairman Mao, Su Lin, the owners and employees of Wild Bob's Rotweiler Rodeo, the artist presently known as The Artist Formerly Known as Prince, the cast and crew of Titanic: The Musical, and any other parties even less remotely connected to Dave’s clinic than the aforementioned, from any claims connected with this relatively harmless daredevil racewalking weekend. I also attest that I am physically fit to participate in this clinic, and certify that I will change my socks every 3,000 miles and will not now, nor in the foreseeable future, racewalk naked in public between the hours of 8:15 a.m. and 4:45 p.m. Now sit up straight, wash behind your ears, and don’t drive with your eyes closed. Have you finished your vegetables, son?