Funny Things the Kids Have Been Saying #1

#1 - Gwen

We're driving home from the grocery store and out of the blue, Gwen says, "The three things I want are a frog, a pocket knife and some rope."

So I ask her, "What would you do with rope?"

She replies, "I dunno."

There is a moment of silence and she says, "Rope is interesting and useful."

Then after thinking for a minute more, "I think a pocket knife would be usefuller."

More thoughts run through her active brain and she asks, "Can you cut paper with a pocket knife?"

I say, "No...well possibly, but it would be hard."

Gwen observes, "Maybe it would be easier if you had three hands."

So I guess now her wish list is a frog, some rope, a pocket knife and another hand...



#2 - Kelly

This morning Kelly comes to me and asks, "Can I give Michael my chicken?" and I'm racking my brain, "Chicken? Does she have a stuffed chicken? One of those fuzzy chicks we got at IKEA?"

I ask, "What chicken?"

She tells me, "My PET chicken, Rose."

I wonder out loud, "Why would you want to give your chicken to Michael?"

Kelly patiently explains, "Because he won't let me call him Buddy Boy unless I give him my chicken."

I'm at a loss for words, but finally I say the shortest thing possible. I want to get a single syllable out before I snicker, "Sure."

Kelly runs in the other room and yells, "Rose is YOURS, BUDDY BOY!!!"

Michael yells back, "I'm NOT Buddy Boy!"

Kelly, comes right back with, "Yes you are, I gave you my chicken! Buddy Boy! Buddy Boy!"

And the rest of the day I hear them calling each other all kinds of variations on the theme - Buddy, Buddy Boy, Buddy Kelly, Buddy Michael, Kell Boy, Kell Buddy."

I'm not sure whose the chicken is currently, and I'm not going to ask, either.



#3 - Michael

Michael recognizes "M's" wherever we are. We'll be driving down the street and pass a McDonald's and he'll yell, "M for Michael!"

When he gets his potty candy, he looks at the M&Ms and says, "M for Michael."

The other day, he was sitting on the couch, looking at a library book and he calls out, "M for Michael!"

I walk over to acknowledge his intelligence and scan the cover, "There isn't an M, Michael."

He insists, "Yes there is! There is an M for Michael!"

He points at a capitol F and tells me, "See there is an M for Michael and it is broken."